From Hoof Hearted to Onoitsmymothernlaw: 13 funny racehorse names
There are around 250,000 names on the current register in the UK with Weatherbys, which is the organisation responsible for processing racehorse names. There are some strict rules around naming a racehorse too but there are some that have slipped through the net, both in the UK and overseas to bring us some fantastically funny racehorse names.
ARRRRR
The racehorse that made every commentator sound like a pirate, and we loved it.
Passing Wind
Passing Wind won two of his races despite his flatulent name.
Hoof Hearted
One not to say quickly and repetitively… In 10 starts, the South African-based horse demonstrated little ability to perform on the track.
Ha Ha Ha
Another one to make commentators sound silly, but during Ha Ha Ha’s six-race career, he finished last twice and was pulled up on two other occasions.
Two In The Pink
A very funny racehorse name (and pretty rude too as a phrase championed by comedian Jimmy Carr). This Ralph Smith-trained horse won at Kempton Park in 2013.
Waikikamukau
This racehorse’s name, pronounced “Why kick a moo cow,” is a New Zealand expression that refers to a very remote place.
Never miss out on the latest happenings in the equestrian world
Mywifenosevrything/Thewifedoesntknow
These two horses are forever linked because of one race in 2010, when they ran against each other at New Jersey’s Monmouth Park. Mywifenosevrything beat Thewifedoesntknow in a classic call.
Onoitsmymothernlaw
Can anyone relate to this one?! Onoitsmymothernlaw only had four career starts which included a win at Saratoga, and the race call included the commentary: “Onoitsmymothernlaw … won’t go away!”
Horsey McHorseface
This American racehorse was given his name after a ship in the UK was named Boaty McBoatface following a public poll.
Stopchargingmaria/Stopshoppingmaria/Stopspendingmaria
These horses were all owned by Mike Repole, who made his fortune as the co-founder of Glaceau, which was sold to Coca-Cola for $4.1 billion in 2007. However, despite his wealth, Mike is apparently not keen on the spending habits of his wife, Maria. He named several horses in this vein, and actually Stopchargingmaria won more than $3m during her career.
You might also be interested in:
All you need to know about naming a racehorse (it’s not as easy as you might think…)
24 of the best (OK, weirdest) horse names we have ever heard
7 horse names that make the grammar police shudder
When our editors were asked which horses in their disciplines had names with spellings that grated on them, it didn't
Subscribe to Horse & Hound magazine today – and enjoy unlimited website access all year round
Horse & Hound magazine, out every Thursday, is packed with all the latest news and reports, as well as interviews, specials, nostalgia, vet and training advice. Find how you can enjoy the magazine delivered to your door every week, plus options to upgrade your subscription to access our online service that brings you breaking news and reports as well as other benefits.
Stay in touch with all the news in the run-up to and throughout the major shows and events during 2026 and beyond with a Horse & Hound subscription. Subscribe today for all you need to know ahead of these major events, plus online reports on the action as it happens from our expert team of reporters and in-depth analysis in our special commemorative magazines. Have a subscription already? Set up your unlimited website access now

Gemma is an experienced journalist, who was a member of H&H staff from 2014 to September 2025. She is passionate about all equestrian sports, including racing and point-to-pointing. She has enjoyed riding out for top trainers Nicky Henderson and Charlie Appleby and took part in a charity Flat race at Epsom in August 2018. Gemma’s has reported from numerous five-star events around Britain and Europe, as well as European championships.