11 situations which only make sense to us horsey nuts #horselogic

Whether you’re a pro, a leisure rider or somewhere in between, you are sure to relate to these 11 tongue-in-cheek scenarios which only horsey folk will understand…

1. Has £3.20 in bank account — orders matching head collar, fleece and leg baggage set in three different colours because it has a 10 per cent discount.

2. ‘I’m in no position to buy another horse’ — spends most evenings scrolling through social media and replying to adverts with ‘got any more pics?’

3. Friday evening: promises other half that they will have a weekend off competing — Sunday morning comes around: will most definitely be found on a UK motorway in the lorry trekking to some far away competition because ‘the judges are great’.

4. ‘He’s snaffle-mouthed’ — said while simultaneously fastening the martingale, drop noseband and draw reins.

5. Cleans house once a month (if lucky) ­— cleans horse’s stable twice a day to immaculate standards.

6. Tells friends she’s ready to find the perfect man — buys a grey gelding.

7. Seven-year-old child says he doesn’t want to do lead-rein anymore — seven-year-old child WILL continue to do lead-rein (he didn’t have to pay for that custom made tweed outfit…)

8. Is 5ft3 with heels — buys a 17hh Hanoverian

9. Has absolutely nothing to wear to the cousin’s wedding — horse has nine sweat rugs, six stable rugs and four turnouts of varying thicknesses.

10. ‘I really want a holiday but I have no time or money’ – books two weeks off work for the summer championships

Continued below…

Liked this? You may also enjoy reading these articles…

11. Eats beans on toast for the whole week before pay day — horse is on a complex diet of oils, fibre and expensive balancer and is fed three times a day.

We continue to publish Horse & Hound magazine weekly during the coronavirus pandemic, as well as keeping horseandhound.co.uk up to date with all the breaking news, features and more. Click here for info about magazine subscriptions (six issues for £6) and access to our premium H&H Plus content online.

You may like...