We live in an age of technology, and the modern horse rider has many fantastic innovations at their disposal – for example, waterproof breeches, non-rip turnout rugs and stain-removing shampoo. However, we think there are still a few gaps in the market – anyone fancy taking out a patent on any of these?
1. Keep-clean spray
If someone could invent some sort of non-toxic, stain-resistant spray you could cover a grey horse in to keep it clean, we’d snap their hand off. We reckon that would give us back about five hours of grooming time a week at least. In fact, we’d be using it on everything from dogs’ paws to cars to our own boots.
2. Yummy medicine
We need some worming paste that horses really enjoy eating – and that perhaps doesn’t set to the consistency of cement when you get it on your clothes.
3. Anti-gravity legwear
Breeches with air bags in them, discreetly styled so as not to add extra bulk. They’d inflate automatically on impact and help prevent bruised bums.
4. A leg up
For older and less supple riders, how about a flexible mounting block which folds up small enough to go into a pocket? If you have to get off for any reason, simply assemble and remount — now we just have to think of a way of getting it back off the floor afterwards!
5. Double comfort
Frankly, we’re surprised this one doesn’t exist already — a cushioned seat saver that can be heated in the winter and cooled in the summer via a battery pack. A discreet switch near the pommel would allow you to choose which you wanted, with options ranging from ‘toasty’ to ‘cool and calm’.
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6. Easy pickings
Poo picking in poor daylight is a thankless task and always takes twice as long as it should, as you spend hours searching under dark hedges for something that might not be there. We’re thinking of some sort of harmless, natural dye that you could add to your horse’s feed so they’d produce a ‘glow in the dark’ poo that you could find easily. We’d like it in a range of colours as well please, so there’d be no more arguments about whose horse was responsible for most of the mess!
7. One size fits all
An adjustable whip that varies in length between schooling whip, dressage whip, jumping whip and showing cane at the touch of a button. Oh, and if it’s not too much to ask, we’d also like it to retract completely into the handle when we don’t need it so that it can go into a pocket.
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