The mother of a showjumper who excelled at national level, represented her country and “filled a room with her smile” has paid tribute to everything she was, as she highlights the lack of support that could have saved her.
Lola Wade died aged 37 just over a year ago after a “long and courageous battle with mental illness and addiction”, her mother Karen Finn said, as she did not get the help she needed for her dual diagnosis.
Karen spoke to H&H as she wanted Lola’s life and many achievements celebrated, and she feels not doing so sends the wrong message about those who suffer as Lola did.
“Despite constant reassurance from those who loved her, Lola carried a deep sense of shame,” she said. “The final years of her life were filled with unimaginable pain and suffering.”
Lola loved horses from the start, riding and looking after ponies in every spare minute. She started competing in showing alongside the likes of Laura Collett, qualifying twice for Horse of the Year Show (HOYS). She moved into showjumping to huge success, earning sponsorship from Wightlink Ferries from her Isle of Wight home, travelling the country and qualifying over the years for just about every pony jumping final at HOYS and representing Britain on Nations Cup and junior European teams.
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The family moved to Surrey, bought a derelict property and set up a yard. Lola trained with Mark Armstrong and over the years went on to more national success, at HOYS, riding for the Renwicks, David and Louise Simpson, Brendon Stud at Pyecombe and Ali Jackson.
“It’s a hard slog for a girl on her own, and I think she started to suffer with her mental health around that time,” Karen said. “I think she had probably suffered throughout her life with it a bit, but it wasn’t obvious.”
Lola moved to London and started a new job there, but then suffered a major mental health issue and was taken to hospital.
“Getting help was a nightmare,” Karen said. “She saw doctor after doctor and she was on medication, which helped when she took it, but the problem with a dual diagnosis, if you’ve got mental health and an addiction, there’s no service in the UK that treats both. In the last few years when we were getting seriously worried about her, we tried to get her into NHS rehab and were told she wasn’t ill enough.
“We had a meeting with her psychiatrist a week before she died and they asked if there was anything I was worried about and I said ‘She’ll die if you don’t do something.’ And she did.”
Karen said Lola did not die as a result of an overdose, it was bad drugs.
“She wanted help, she needed someone to take control of her and there was no one available,” she said. “There’s no proper help for a dual diagnosis, which is disgraceful.”
Karen wants to highlight these failings in the system, as she believes dual-diagnosis centres, at which psychiatrists and addiction specialists worked together, would give people more of a chance.
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“She was beautiful, intelligent, talented,” she said. “She loved her horses and showjumping, she was very vivacious and intelligent. You’d think she should have had it all but if you’re dealt that kind of illness, there’s no help. This could be anyone’s child.”
Pyecombe ran a Lola Wade memorial grand prix on Sunday (2 August), won by Fraser Reed and SES Jumeirah. The first prize was £1,000, thanks to donations from Lola’s friends and family.
Caz Light, who runs Pyecombe shows, told H&H Lola rode many horses whose offspring were competing at the show. The team is also installing a bench by the ring, draped in banners in Lola’s favourite colour, purple. There were turnout and grooms’ prizes, as well as rugs and sashes in Lola’s colours.
“We thought it would be a nice way to remember her,” she said, adding that most of the organising was thanks to Lola’s close friend James Hawkins, who also works there.
“She competed here regularly, she rode for us, worked for us, we were her local centre. So it was apt and fitting that we worked together and came up with doing this class for Lola.”
Eleanor is an experienced journalist who spent over eight years working for local and national newspapers before joining H&H as news editor in March 2016. Passionate about equine welfare and exposing the truth, Eleanor has reported on all aspects of the industry, from Brexit to anti-bullying campaigns, and from dressage rules to mules. Her sport of choice is showjumping, in which she competes her own horses, and she also enjoys reporting at local jumping shows through to international championships.
