Hovis’ Friday diary: I don’t take anything. Other than the pee — out of mother, on a frequent basis…

Dear diary,

So, as you read this, I will be ensconced in my stable at Your Horse is Alive meeting and greeting fans, hanging out with the stars and very possibly having a reunion with my favourite eventing queen. You’ll just have to go to the performances and see!

Nearly as pleased as Cool New Shoes Man when he came to shoe me on Tuesday and I showed him a clean set of heels — by throwing them up in his face and running off… The fact he plastered the video of this across Facebook was unfortunate as it meant she-who-must-be-obeyed saw it and was less than amused. She was fuming even further when tales of my antics on Wednesday got back to her: Aunty Em had decided to give me a gentle leg stretch on the lunge to limber me up ahead of the weekend. I decided that having a mad half an hour was much more fun and even the combined talent, training and frankly weight of Aunty Em AND then the Boss Lady was not going to stop me. Aunty Em’s impassioned pleas of “for God’s sake please stop before you lame yourself and I’m murdered by your mother” were not enough to deter me from my Mach 9 wall of death, which only came to an end when the Boss Lady eventually cunningly ran me into the school fence line.

Equally on a serious note (and yes, I am capable of that), let’s not forget why I’m here. It’s Bransby Horse’s 50th year — 50 years of helping horses and donkeys who can’t help themselves, 50 years of being a voice against suffering and an end to cruelty, 50 years of safe harbour and love to those who have never known it. I’m proud to be associated with that and if you guys find me funny and can find it in your hearts to buy the new book, then rest assured, every single penny goes to the charity. I don’t take anything. Other than the pee — out of mother, on a frequent basis…

Stay in touch with all the news in the run-up to and throughout the major shows and events during 2026 and beyond with a Horse & Hound subscription. Subscribe today for all you need to know ahead of these major events, plus online reports on the action as it happens from our expert team of reporters and in-depth analysis in our special commemorative magazines. Have a subscription already? Set up your unlimited website access now

Hovis shared his weekly diary each Friday on the Horse & Hound website between 2008 and February 2025. Initially located on the popular H&H forum, he moved to the main website in February 2013. He published nine books, each to raise funds for his local equine welfare charity Bransby Horses. You can read all his diary entries below. H&H also published a final tribute to our much-loved equine contributor.

Join the Hovis fan group on Facebook

Hovis’ Friday diary: I don’t take anything. Other than the pee — out of mother, on a frequent basis…

This week has seen me clipped, washed, brushed and generally titivated with to within an inch of my life, which I have repaid by rolling in the biggest pile of mud and dirt I could find. Mum was so pleased.

Prayers were apparently sent to any deity who looks after both dumb animals (who they were praying for I know not?) and sharers such that I didn’t turn up yesterday hopping lame. I also think the use of drugs was mentioned but I’m not sure whether this was for me or mother?

Continued below…

Hovis’ Friday diary: spring and autumn are the R&R seasons; revenge and reminder