Andrew Nicholson has six CCI4* titles to his name, heads the rider rankings and has already snared this year’s lucrative HSBC FEI Classics. But he still lacks a Twitter account.

However, that hasn’t stopped friends and admirers of the eventing phenomenon imagining the gems that he might tweet — with the hashtag #nicholsonontwitter.

“I’d bring the five-year-olds out at one-star but the FEI won’t let me,” is one typical offering.

When are they going to bring out five-star courses? This is too easy,” is another, while Paul Tapner made this contribution after Luhmühlen: “Useless! Can’t believe I was only 1st and 6th; should’ve been 1, 2, 3.”

So are we likely to see the real Nicholson online any time soon?

Don’t hold your breath. During his only known foray onto Twitter, at Barbury Horse Trials last week (4 July), Andrew admitted he’s not sure how anyone finds the time to tweet.

Well how else does he get those results?